Recruiter Email Composed as Nigerian Bank Letter

I was reading Jim Duffy’s post and the following came to mind after a colleague mentioned it…

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REQUEST FOR URGENT BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP

First, I must solicit your strictest confidence in this transaction.  This is by virtue of its nature as being utterly confidential and “Top Secret”.   My name is Dr. Akeem Biobaku and I work with VCs and start-up ventures.  I formally was the secret founder of Intel, Microsoft and Cisco.

I don’t know if you are familiar with the Team, but they are considered Titans in the networking industry.  Two of their companies were acquired for over $31B over the last seven years.  They have started a New Venture involving open stack cloud computing, distributed data storage and they have given me the exclusive license to recruit talent for the New Venture.  They also plan to incorporate a gameified, stratified based business model that leverages crowdsourcing to virtualize the cloud to prepare it for the meta-data to meta-cloud transition.

You have been recommended by an associate who assured me in confidence of your ability and reliability to prosecute a pending business transaction of great magnitude, requiring maximum confidence.  I hope you take that as a compliment.

The thing about this New Venture (beyond its technical brilliance) is that the Titans are all top officials of the Big Company.  The particularly unique and rare is that it is a virtual guarantee for high financial payout to those who join especially at this early stage because of the pre-arrangement with the Big Company.

We have agreed to share the money thus:

  1. 20% for the joiners (Non-Titans)
  2. 70% for us (Titans)
  3. 10% to be used in settling all expenses (our end and your end)

Though the New Venture is just a few weeks old, the NY Times is already following it: http://bits.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/03/16/ciscos-bold-networking-startup/

In order to commence this business, we solicit your assistance to enable us to complete the transactions.  We are looking forward to doing this business with you and solicit your confidentiality in this transaction.  Please acknowledge the receipt of this letter.  I will bring you into the complete picture of this pending project with the New Venture when I have heard from you.

Yours Faithfully,

Dr. Akeem Biobaku